December 2009 E-Newsletter

As we prepare to say goodbye to 2009 and welcome the fresh start of another year we recognize this past year has been difficult for many, the two of us included. 2009 has challenged us in ways we never expected. These challenges have pushed us out of our comfort zone and allowed us to dream bigger and want more for the campuses, individuals and communities we have the honor of serving. As we prepare to embark on 2010 our work as speakers, authors and activists is going to a whole new level and in some wonderful new directions. We have begun work on several revolutionary projects that are currently on the forefront of our minds and in our hearts, ones we hope many of you will participate in and embrace.

Thinking bigger and offering more has shifted our focus and the long term vision of Unite for Change. In 2010 we will be re-branding, re-launching and expanding the mission of Unite for Change. Through new partnerships, creative alignments and the dedicated work of our staff and volunteers our new projects are all progressing slowly but surely and will be introduced throughout 2010. Slowing down to respect the process has been difficult for us both so your positive thoughts and prayers for patience are welcome. Starting with our January e-news we will begin sharing the new direction of Unite for Change with you. We can hardly wait!

One opportunity that presented itself in 2009, for which we are so grateful is that Unite for Change is going global. This summer we will be working across the globe with 200 student representatives from 50 countries throughout the world to help end violence against women. Needless to say we are humbled and excited about this project. Our first e-news of the New Year will include information about opportunities for you to be involved.

We have the highest of hopes for 2010 and look forward to continuing this amazing journey. We have said it before but cannot say it often enough- thank you for your support, friendship and faith. It continues to motivate us.

Happy Holidays from our family to you and yours. May this coming year bring you all the luck, love and happiness you deserve.

A GIFT FOR YOU

In the spirit of the holidays we want to give you a gift that keeps on giving, knowledge! And you know us we like to keep it spicy so our gift of knowledge is all about sex (safe and consensual of course).

We would like to introduce you to Scarleteen, the most fantastic resource for sex education we've come across which was founded and created by Heather Corrina who is by far one of the most righteous women we have the pleasure of knowing. Scarleteen is the premier online sexuality resource for young people worldwide. The website is filled with information, resources and absolutely everything you ever wanted to know about sex.

This is a gift we are certain you will want to share with others!

PROTECTING YOUR POSSE

In a perfect world violence would not exist and neither would drug facilitated sexual assault but until that day comes we've got to look out for ourselves and each other. This month's featured resource provides the essential 411 on protecting yourself and your posse from drug facilitated sexual assaults. A PDF version of this resource and several others are available at UniteforChange.com

Preventing Drug Facilitated Assaults

Having sex with someone who cannot resist or say "no" because the person is drugged, drunk, passed out, unconscious, or asleep may be sexual assault. The fact that a person has been drinking does not imply consent. When there is any uncertainty about a person's ability to give consent, it is best to wait for another time. Simply put, when in doubt, don't.

Protect Yourself and Your Posse

• Be aware of your surroundings, particularly at parties, bars and clubs and trust your instincts.
• Don't accept opened drinks, including nonalcoholic ones, (no matter how hot they are).
• If someone offers you a drink from the bar at a club or party, accompany the person to the bar to order your drink, watch the drink being poured, and then carry the drink yourself.
• Don't drink from bottles or containers being passed around or share or exchange drinks with anyone (even if it's a friend, you don't know if there drink has been altered).
• No matter how appealing it looks or delicious it may taste, don't drink home-made vats of mixed drinks from a bath tub, community cooler, etc.
• If possible, bring your own drinks to parties (alcoholic and non-alcoholic).
• Don't leave your drink unattended while talking, dancing, using the restroom, etc. Take it with you everywhere.
• If you realize your drink has been left unattended set it free.
• Don't drink anything that has an unusual taste or appearance (e.g., salty taste, excessive foam, unexplained residue).
• In advance of going out, make plans with your friends to check on each other (especially the designated sober person).
• If you start to feel strange or unusually intoxicated, seek help from a friend or someone you trust.
• Go home with the same group of people you went out with.
• Don't mix sex and alcohol. Alcohol impairs inhibitions, judgment and decision-making.

Signs You May Have Been Drugged

• Feeling much more intoxicated than your usual response to the amount of alcohol you consumed.
• Waking up very hung over, feeling "fuzzy."
• Experience memory lapse or "loss of time."
• Unable to recall what happened for a period of time after you consumed a drink.
• Feeling as though someone had sex with you, but unable to remember parts of or the entire incident.

Not everyone is affected by these drugs the same way. The effects may vary depending upon the drug, the dosage, and whether the drug is mixed with alcohol or other drugs. Other factors that influence how a particular drug will affect you are your weight, gender and metabolism.

If you or a person you know might have been drugged and/or assaulted under the influence of any drug

• Go to a safe place and get help immediately, call 911 or the campus emergency number.
• Ask a trusted friend to stay with you and assist you in getting the services you need.
• Get medical care immediately. Go to a hospital emergency department as soon as possible for an examination and evidence collection.
• Try not to urinate prior to providing urine samples. If possible, find cups or glasses from which you drank and/or a sample of the suspect beverage, and submit these to the police for laboratory tests.
• If you think you may have been sexually assaulted, you should have a specialized sexual assault examination. Preserve all physical evidence of the assault. If possible, do not shower, bathe, douche, eat, drink, wash your hands, or brush your teeth before you have a medical evaluation. Save the clothing you were wearing at the time of the assault. Try not to disturb anything in the area where the assault may have occurred.
• Call a rape crisis center for support and information. You can contact RAINN at 1-800-656-HOPE and they will connect you to a rape crisis center in your area.

Whatever your passion, whatever the cause, bring awareness by talking about "IT."

Focused, Determined and Hopeful -
Kelly & Becca

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